Too Distraught - Parshat Shemot

Have you ever had a situation when you were too distraught to actually focus on an activity or an assignment? This happened to me this week after my brother-in-law, Yitz Kurtz, was niftar.

I was trying to decide whether or not to incorporate this into my essay. What would I write about, how to write it, etc? I was confused and having difficulty focusing. Do I skip this week altogether or just write a short message?

I took my cue from this week's parsha - Parshat Shemot. God appears to Moses with the announcement of redemption and when Moses asks God "when they ask for your name, what do I tell them?" God instructs Moses to tell the people: "I will be who I will be", and then adds, "I will be sent me to you."1 Why is there a repetition? What about the not so subtle change in name? What meaning does it have?

Rashi answers with a description of the discussion that must have occurred. When Moses heard the first name, "I will be who I will be, he asked for its meaning. God answered, I will be with them in future distressful situations as I am with them in this distressful time. Moses replied that the people are having enough trouble dealing with this present distressful period - don’t even mention another time when there will also be distress. And so, God answers - Ok; just tell them 'I will be'. I will be there. "I will be present with them in distress", says the psalmist2. I am here and share their experience.

When we pray to God for something, we are not telling Him something he does not know. He knows if we are lacking something. Sometimes, though it is just enough to share with Him that we need something and to know that He is listening and looking out for our welfare.

This may be very much what mourning and the comforting of mourners during the shiva is all about. No one is coming to visit the mourner in order to change the situation. That is impossible. No one can bring anyone back from the dead. Rather I believe, the purpose is to simply be there and somehow lessen the pain. In a form of imitatio dei, be present with them in distress. Just the fact that someone can be with a mourner who is experiencing pain and allow them to discuss the pain freely and openly is, in itself, a comfort.

The meaning of the moment3, of the here and now, is so important that God writes about it in the grammatical present continuous, "I will be". We are to be, as much as humanly possible, in the here and now and to experience the moment. Whether in pain or in happiness - that is our task. Whether it is our own experience or the experiences of others, God asks of us to be human.

לע"נ יצחק צבי מאיר בן בנימן שרגא פייבל חיים

  1. Shemot 3:14
  2. Psalms 91:16
  3. 'Meaning of the moment' is a major theme of Viktor Frankl's logotherapy.

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Have A Great Shabbat!laughing

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