Can Death be Understood? - Parshat Chukkat
Understanding death is one of the mightiest struggles we encounter throughout our lives. Yet few, if any, actually attain a grasp on what it is. How do we react? Some extremists deny its existence, others have belief systems which explain that it's a part of something greater but, on a day-to-day basis, most of us simply choose to ignore it. The concept is so complex and so threatening that it is just easier to ignore it. After all, is it truly possible to understand?
In this week's parsha, Parshat Chukkat, the laws of purification from a status of impurity are discussed. Specifically it is dealing with the impurity caused by being in the proximity of a dead person. The ashes of a red heifer are mixed with water and sprinkled on the impure person and that aids him in the purification process.1 Yet there seems to be a contradiction within these laws. On the one hand , we said that this water can purify the impure person. Others, however, who are pure, if involved in the preparation process or the purification process and they come into direct or even indirect contact with the same water, will become impure. That same water will cause impurity as well as purity! It is the same ashes, the same water - how can that be??
Even King Solomon, the wisest of men said "I thought myself smart yet IT is beyond me".2 The rabbis explain that when King Solomon said "it", he was referring to the laws of the red heifer. Even he could not make sense of this seeming contradiction.
Rabbi Aryeh Leibowitz shares a fascinating insight.3 This seeming contradiction in the laws of the water mixed with the ashes of the red heifer is given to us to teach us an important lesson. Just as there are concepts in the Torah which are beyond our ability to understand them, so too there are things in life which are beyond our ability to understand them.
It is much easier to motivate ourselves when we understand things fully. Perhaps God wants us to get used to the idea that there will be things that we will not understand. They are simply beyond our comprehension. To accustom us to the idea that there are things beyond our understanding, God gives us this law specifically in the area of impurity caused by being in the proximity of a dead person. Death, one of the great unknowns of humankind, can be confusing. It can sometimes occur in situations that seem to make no sense. We therefore have the water of the red heifer to remind us that we are not to understand everything.
So, what can we do???
We live with the illusion that everything is understandable. It is not. We live with the illusion that humankind can figure it all out. We cannot.
Some things just need to be accepted.
So, again I ask, what can we do??? Do we give up?
"Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”(Frankl) 4 What way will we choose when confronted with a life-event that challenges us? How will we choose to react when losing someone in their youth or in the prime of their life?
That is up to us. We get to choose that attitude. This is not to say to ignore the pain and confusion, the sadness and anguish. They are real. They are powerful. They need to be recognized and felt. There needs to be expression for those feelings. The pain and anguish of loss may be strong. So is the human who experiences them.
Understand death? Not likely. Find meaning in the death of a close relative or friend? Better chance. There is always meaning to be found there, if we only look for it.
Notes
1. Bamidbar 19:19-21
2. Kohelet 9:7
3. Rabbi Leibowitz audio lecture - yutorah.org
4. Frankl, Man's Search for Meaning
Have A Great Shabbat!
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