STOP! Therapist Safety Checkpoint: Do You Offer A Safety Zone For Your Clients?

As you would take your car for a tune up or go for a well visit, treat yourself to a facial or check in at the dentist. You owe it to yourself and to your clients to do an atunement from time to time. What that means is looking deep inside for clues about what you do as a therapist when overwhelmed by discomfort, flooding of emotions, clouded with responsibilities or mental fatigue. This is not fully classified as counter-transference because many of these scenarios are therapist induced.

Ask yourself this question: Am I providing a safe space for clients to release almost anything that they choose to express? The good? The bad? The sad and the ugly?

Here's a bit of a quiz:

1) What do I do when someone, anyone becomes emotional in my presence? Do I tense up? Try to “fix” the problem/situation? Listen intently with the hope that this wave will pass quickly or be fully present and respond to what emerges in the moment?

2) When issues arise that are beyond my scope of expertise or touch upon discomfort-for some it may be death, for others illness, possibly gender concerns or philosophy and religion. Do I find a way to avoid the subject, express personal opinions and views, refer to an expert or carefully and objectively explore with the client?

3) Then there's the time when a therapist may be so inundated that he/she is not awareof being simply unavailable. Ever feel your mind wander to your phone, then to what's for lunch, trekking to your mental to do list or pondering the recent cancellation? The client sitting In the chair knows you are not there but you don't. Do you a) Share that you are distracted for some vague but valid reason; b) Excuse yourself and cut the session short; c) Try to regroup, focus and put all other issues on hold while with the client?

4) You receive a phone call after hours, not in the mood or too busy to accept the call. You don't suspect crisis. Do you postpone till business hours? Wait until the client calls again? Or call back within two hours to acknowledge the call and arrange for a follow-up.

5) A major event occurs in the client’s life. A birthday, a move, a promotion, an award, a loss or a trauma. Do you follow up and ask about the event in subsequent visits or address strictly what client presents?

Take a few minutes to be honest with yourself. As therapists we address content but we are also accountable for the relational exchange that occurs in real time. It takes practice and a great sense of self awareness. Ask the question: What am I emitting today, relational healing or emotional pollution?

It can be helpful to enlist the help of a peer in addition to a supervisor.