Author: Rabbi Dovid M. Cohen, Esq.

March 4th, 2013

I once heard a story about asingle man struggling to find a spouse. His main challenge was his insistence that a potential matepermanently welcome his widowed mother into their marital home. A friend suggested that he speak with the great authority,HaravShlomoZalmanAuerbachzt’l. The single man shared with the Ravhis delicate predicament. The Rav validated the man’s approach as acceptable.Sometime later, the man met his “bashert,” the special women willing to live along with mom. They returned
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March 4th, 2013

Menchlichkeit,Good Middos,Patience and Wisdom

These are the accolades I heard over and over again by stepchildren and stepparents
describing the attributes of a good stepparent.

There were those who became stepchildren due to the death of a parent., There were
those whose divorced parents married a single person. Other parents had both been
divorced. Some came with children of their own and blended their famil …
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February 19th, 2013

By Dr. Shuli Sandler

“My son takes an hour to get up in the morning…”
“My daughter’s backpack is a disaster!”
“Yitzchak can’t sit still in class. He’s always so fidgety.”
“Batya doesn’t raise her hand in class. She always calls out.”
“Laurie doesn’t study for her Chumash test unless I am hovering over her.”
&ld …
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February 19th, 2013

Lili Grun, LCSW
Rabbi Richard Louis Price M.D.



The theme of boundaries is woven throughout Jewish culture. This theme is apparent in the first human action. Adam delineated between human and animal, and created a boundary of identity for each animal through naming. Avraham was called  haIvri  (“the one from the other side”) because he distinguished himself from others, standing one side of a spiri …
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February 19th, 2013

By Yehuda Lieberman
I have, in the past, defined true self-esteem as a positive feeling about oneself based on intrinsic attributes, similar to the way that we feel about others for whom we have esteem. What are the benefits of having true self-esteem, and what are the consequences of not having a positive sense of self?
    While there are many mental health issues that can be strongly impacted by low self-esteem, anxiet …
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February 19th, 2013

Michael J. Salamon

    Every industry, has its own busy season, and for mental health professionals, the holiday seasons seem to be the busiest. What is interesting is that the stressors that cause these holiday blues are not linked to any particular religious or ethnic group. All people seem to suffer increasing seasonal stress even if they do not celebrate the actual holiday.

Starting from a few days before …
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February 19th, 2013

By Chaya Tauber There is a secret many parents harbor and are afraid to admit- liking one child more than another. When this was brought up during a parenting group, one parent immediately responded, "I love all my children equally."   While this response sounds like the correct thing to say, it is usually untrue.  It may be the age or stage the child is in that appeals more to a parent.  It may be the child's personality.  So …
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February 19th, 2013

By Pamela Siller

The phone rang once, but was ignored.  However, the caller was persistent, and the pattern was repeated.  Mrs. Rosen sat at the kitchen table with her head in her hands. She did not need the caller ID to tell her that her daughter’s school was calling yet again. Leah’s problems started when she was a young child.  Her early tantrums were passed off as the normal “terrible two’s,&r …
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February 19th, 2013

Rosalind Levine

There is a donkey in the middle of the road. A man wants to pass and so he yells at the donkey, telling it to move but the donkey does not budge. So he gets behind the animal, takes a stick and hits the donkey.  Again, it does not budge. So the man tries to push the donkey and kicks it. No movement. He then goes to the other end and offers the donkey some grass and, lo and behold, the donkey follows the man and mov …
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February 19th, 2013

By Nancy Zwiebach


These words, commonly quoted within the Jewish world, carry great meaning. As a Self Esteem Facilitator and psychotherapist, it is my goal to help people understand that caring for oneself is a mandate and that, like the instructions given by flight attendants on airplanes, you must care for yourself first if you are going to do your best in caring for others.

Anyone who is a parent experiences, along …
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February 19th, 2013

By Rabbi Raffi Bilek

The Talmud teaches us that a man is obligated to teach his son Torah, find him a bride, teach him a trade, and according to some even to teach him how to swim (Kiddushin 29a).  In short, parents are required to give their children the tools needed to lead successful lives.  We cannot raise our children without teaching them what they need to know to support themselves, nor can we rear them without offerin …
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February 19th, 2013

Dr. Norman N. Blumenthal

Terrorist attack in Toulouse….Gunman kills children in Newtown, Connecticut…Bombs continue to fall in Southern Israel…Child abducted in Brooklyn…
The news abounds with frightening and catastrophic events from which it is increasingly hard to insulate our children. Should we continue to try to protect our children from an awareness of such misfortune? If we have to resign ourselv …
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February 19th, 2013

By Dvorah Levy
Our spouses have the ability to hurt us in a way that very few others can. How we understand these particular hurts and the process of working through them is the key to getting to forgiveness. Can all hurts be forgiven in marriage? The answer is “yes” but it requires a process that takes work, understanding and patience. The insight and understanding gained when working on repairing a deep hurt often bring couples …
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February 19th, 2013

In the course of our 120 years there will be, Gd willing, many wonderful times.  However, since we are here to grow, we may also face stress, loss, and hardships.  Some of us might experience abuse, neglect, poverty, or financial strain.  Others might face challenges in marriage or parenting, mental illness, or medical illness. Accidents, war, crimes, or “acts of nature” may undermine our sense of safety.  No …
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February 19th, 2013

“My student’s mother is impossible!” exclaimed Mrs. Melamed to the teachers.  “Her son’s pants are always falling down an inch.  I’ve been making an extra check box in red next to his homework with the word ‘belt’ to remind Mom.  She fills out the rest of the homework but ignores ‘belt;’the next day, this kid’s pants are falling down.”  Ever sympathetic, t …
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February 19th, 2013

By Seymour Hoffman

The attitude of ultra-orthodox rabbis toward mental health practitioners varies from outright hostility and distrust to respect and cooperation. The former generally view psychotherapists as a threat to religion and religious values, while the latter generally relate to them as colleagues in ministering to the emotional and psychological needs of people in distress. The former group, generally, is highly vocal in its …
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February 19th, 2013

By Benyamin Halpern We all hear the buzzword “anxiety,” along with statistics like those stating that one out of three people will battle anxiety in their lifetime. What is anxiety? What causes it, and how does one overcome it? And what is the Torah’s prospective?   Almost every normal person will experience anxiety and/or its related conditions during their lifetime to some degree.   A third of the population will ex …
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January 3rd, 2013

Rabbi Richard Louis Price, M.D.

I am writing these reflections on the Newtown, Connecticut Massacre for The Jewish Press December
20, 2012. Most likely, by the time these words have been published, we will have more information
and greater insight and understanding as to what went wrong on that tragic day. Nevertheless, for the
sake of my own catharsis and hopefully for the benefit of the readers of this publication, I s …
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December 30th, 2012

LEAH ROKEACH  LCSW Ms. S. is 31 years old and has been hearing voices for the past 10 years.  The voices come almost every day and they tell her that she is a failure, will never amount to anything, no one likes her or respects her.  Ms. S. was diagnosed with schizophrenia.  At the age of 21 she was told she has a disease of the brain and will need to take medication for the rest of her life.  She was a senior in college …
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November 28th, 2012

Dr. Judith Guedalia © 2012

Director, Neuropsychology Unit; Chief Psychologist; Shaare Zedek Medical Center; Licensed Supervisor
and Specialist in Medical, Rehabilitation, and Developmental Psychology; EMDR Certified Practitioner:
Supervisor; Certified ADOS Diagnostician; Co-Chair Nefesh Israel. Dr. Guedalia can be reached through her
website: www.drjudithguedalia.com ALSO her new book:A Neuropsychologist’s Jou …
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November 28th, 2012

Addiction necessitates secrecy, double lives, and self-denial in order to allow self-destructive behaviors
to persist over time. The addiction can survive so long as addicts can sustain their dual Jeckle and
Hyde existence. Once the behaviors are exposed, discovered, or revealed by loved ones, the addict
can no longer easily maintain this lifestyle, and is often forced to confront the unpleasant truth about
the reality he/she …
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November 28th, 2012

My initial intention in writing this article was to explore various aspects of the “shidduch crisis” but
as I wrote I found my thoughts turning to a larger problem that needs to be addressed. A problem
that contributes to the “shidduch crisis” and causes so many other problems in our community. The
“shidduch crisis” is a nisoyon and we need to be careful about the propositions we make about it. T …
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November 28th, 2012

One of my clients once told me about the first time that she was taken to a

mental hospital. She was very confused. She didn’t feel comfortable in her body. She

didn’t know how to be or what to do next. She kept on trying to run to the nurse’s

station because she was terrified of the other patients. In the end she was strapped to

her bed to keep her safe and out the way. She was diagno …
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November 28th, 2012

Rabbi Noach Orlowek, shlit”a, defines anger as “the distance between expectation and reality.”
I think this definition neatly explains much of the parental anger that we moms and dads struggle with
as we try to raise superstar children. So much of our anger is the result of our having expectations of
our children that are not met. This does not mean that we shouldn’t have expectations of them – only …
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November 28th, 2012

Anyone who has attended one of my parenting workshops will be surprised to hear me touting
the word “no.” My usual mantra, after all, is “never say ‘no’ when you can say ‘yes.” I still
maintain this “golden rule” because I find that many parents say no automatically because
that’s the answer they would have gotten from their parents. Thus, it often comes without
reall …
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November 28th, 2012

What’s the difference between private mental experiences (things that happens inside of us), and
concrete external behaviors (things that happen outside of us)?

One of the main differences is that we can experience things that happen outside of us by using our
senses.

For example, when people smile, we can see their lips turned up in the familiar expression (an outside
behavior). When someone looks away …
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November 27th, 2012

Tali Moskowitz, LCSW

The Mysterious Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde is a novella by
Robert Louis Stevenson about a prominent doctor who believes
that there are two parts to every person: good and evil. As an
experiment, the doctor creates a potion that divides the two sides of
his character, allowing him to transform between the good person
and the evil person inside of himself. Sometimes he is Dr. Jekyll,
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November 27th, 2012

BIPOLAR – NOT A LIFE SENTENCE

By Dr. Miriam Adahan

Chaim* was admired in yeshiva for his incredible diligence. His days were consumed
with learning and he could be found in the Beis Midrash almost 24/7. For him, sleep was a waste
of time.Great things were forecast for his future until neighbors found him lying in the middle of
the street in Geula, hallucinating that he was Moshiach. Medications stopped h …
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November 27th, 2012

Rates of anxiety among young people in America have steadily increased over the
past fifty to seventy years. Today, five to eight times as many high school and college
students meet the criteria for diagnosis of major depression and/or an anxiety disorder.
As many as 20 percent of children between the ages of 5 and 16 experience some
type of anxiety, compared to the 5 percent of kids worldwide with attention deficit/
hype …
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November 27th, 2012

Shmuel is an 8 year old boy who cannot tolerate changes in his routine and if
things do not go the way he expects them to, he can erupt into a tantrum that
terrifies his mother and his siblings. For example, one night, Shmuel wanted to
read a book that his brother was reading and promptly took it out of his brother's
hands. His mother tried to educate Shmuel that it was inappropriate to do that
but Shmuel just didn't unde …
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Author: Mindy Hajdu, MS, LMSW

November 27th, 2012

Moshe and Sarah have been married for 5 years. Moshe describes Sarah as controlling and critical. Sarah describes Moshe as withdrawn and aloof. The conflict between Moshe and Sarah has increased with time, causing each to feel disillusioned with the other.

Just as in mainstream society, our community too has its share of couples living in a state of mutual disconnection and contention. The reason? "He needs to change!" she wags her finger. "She needs to wake up and smell the coffee!" he rebuffs. Each holds onto his or her position tenuously. Until then, husband and wife pass by like ships in the night, living two very lonely lives.
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November 4th, 2012

He recognized me before I recognized him. We were in Yerushalayim on different sides of the street.  He was six foot two waving and yelling my name. "Noach, Noach, Noach Schwartz, the social worker! It's me Yechiel Klein! Don't you remember me? "He was wearing a hat, white shirt and suit and looked like a regular bochur from the Mir or Brisk. He did not look like the Yechiel I had met ten years earlier at a clinic in Boro Park.   …
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October 17th, 2012

Robin B. Zeiger, Ph.D. I must confess. I am privileged to collect and "play with" toys for a living.  In addition to traditional psychotherapy, I am a sand-tray therapist.  Sand-tray therapy is a technique developed by the students of Carl Jung.  Clients place miniature objects in a table-top sand-tray to create, symbolize, and work with their world.  One of my favorite groups of toys is my mirrors.  Mirrors help us jud …
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October 6th, 2012

By Dvorah Levy, LCSW I had the honor of speaking at two singles events this weekend and observing the world of people trying to meet that special person with whom they can form an attachment. I quote a friend who said, regarding the continuing effort to find the right relationship, that "it is the triumph of hope over experience." We are hardwired to want to be in a relationship with someone. That yearning is a very human and special part of our …
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September 2nd, 2012

 “Is it possible for my disabled child to get married?” This is a question that parents often ask. Their son or daughter may often convey “I also want to get married just like my sister or my brother or my friend.”   It is painful for persons of disabilities to see others get married while they are left behind. At the same time, there are naturally additional challenges to marriage amongst those with disabilitie …
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September 1st, 2012

Aviva Barnett Personally, I believe that when I make choices and take responsibility for my life, I am living with my eyes wide open. When I have death in mind, I try not to take my loved ones for granted. If I had death in mind when I say goodbye to my husband at the start of the day as we leave home for work, I would realise that there is a possibility that either one of us may not come back. Death is always a possibility. I want to be open to …
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Author: Dr. Yisroel Susskind, Ph.D.

September 1st, 2012

For years, I have taught clients that Torah forbids us from acting and speaking in anger. We have a right to take unilateral action to protect our legitimate needs; that action should be done with calmness, courage, determination and forcefulness; but without anger, hatred, resentment or vengeance. People need to communicate their hurt, clearly and directly, and that communication is obscured when they speak in anger.
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September 1st, 2012

Yitzchak Rosman, Psy.D. “I can give you $3,800, but can’t go any higher.” My stomach dropped. How could he only offer $3,800? I bought the car three-and-a-half years ago for roughly $16,000 and, while it now had a few dings and scratches (and was in a couple of minor accidents), it still worked as perfectly as the day I was first handed the keys and title. How could he not see the value?! I was having my subcompact car appraise …
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August 26th, 2012

 Hindie M. Klein, PsyD  They are born of the same parents, yet they are so different. They are loving and petty, helpful and hurtful, envious and generous, confidantes and rivals. With just one look, they can be giggling uncontrollably and with another, they can hurt coldly and squarely. They are bound forever, in times of happiness and in pain. And even if they don’t particularly like each other, they love each other.   The …
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August 26th, 2012

Tali Moskowitz, LCSW               Imagine your boss has sent out an email with the intention of motivating his employees. There will be a productivity competition, and the winner will receive a monetary reward. This may bring out a competitive part of you and motivate you to win the prize. How do you think this competition would cause you to feel toward your co-workers? Perhaps you wou …
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