Author: Mirel T Goldstein, M.S., M.A., LPC

What do you do if you really don't believe in divorce if there are children involved and you really want to work it out but your partner doesn't really care and isn't really willing to put in much effort? Is there a way to do it all on your own and if yes how and if not do you have to just give up because you're the only one who cares?
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Author: Mirel T Goldstein, M.S., M.A., LPC

Dear Mirel,
My teenage son is coming home as late as one in the morning most nights. I know for a fact that he is hanging out with kids who are doing drugs. He insists that he would never be stupid enough to use anything himself. I always trusted my children. My husband is telling me not to trust him with these other kids and I should not allow them to be friends. I am not sure which way to go with this. Should I arrange that my son can no longer hang out with these kids?
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Author: Mirel T Goldstein, M.S., M.A., LPC

As Printed in the Jewish Press Health Supplement of December 29, 2010
It is well-known that children who are comfortably and securely attached to their parents do much better at growing up and thriving than children who are not secure. According to Psychiatrist John Bowlby and a large body of research on children, securely attached children easily go back and forth between turning to their parents for emotional support and expressing their independence. In more recent years, Psychologist Peter Fonagy and his colleagues have highlighted some of the things that parents can do to help their children become secure. Here are some tips from this body of research on mentalization and marked contingent mirroring:
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Author: Mirel T Goldstein, M.S., M.A., LPC

Dear Therapist,
My 11 year old daughter comes home from school everyday crying as she is being teased by the other kids in her class. She tells me that the other kids call her fat, make fun of her clothing and tell her that she smells. I know my child isn't those things but she is still being picked on. I hear her in the bathroom crying about how she sits in school alone at lunch and no one wants to play with her at recess because she isn't good at sports. I wonder what happened to the girls that she used to be friends with? Why are the girls so mean? Where happened to the good kids and the values that I was taught growing up?
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Author: Mirel T Goldstein, M.S., M.A., LPC

Dear therapist,
I am a father of a young girl in her 20's who has been having recurrent "anxiety/panic attacks" and I am at a loss as to how to help her? I am not sure that the "attacks" are really panic attacks but rather tantrums or shall I say a call for attention. She is not in school and doesn't work despite being an intelligent young lady. She no longer goes out with friends and is attached to myself and her mother. I realize that she may suffer from separation anxiety resulting from her youth. However its only in the last year that she really began acting out and my wife and I see that she isn't at all happy and completely unmotivated. We have given her many job opportunities but she will always find an excuse not to follow through. Her hysterical behavior and outbursts of feeling dizzy and nauseous land us in the Emergency room on many occasions. However she is rarely admitted since the hospital can find no justification to keep her or she would refuse by snapping out of it and demand that she go home. My wife and I don't know what we can do and these "attacks/tantrums" occur daily.
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Author: Mirel T Goldstein, M.S., M.A., LPC

Dear Therapist,
I have a close friend who has been suffering from post-partum depression for over a year now. She has seen many therapists, which at first seem to provide a beacon of hope but eventually at some point she feels betrayed and ends the relationship. She has tried a variety of medications which have all backfired to the point of hospitalization and major suicidal thoughts. All authorities on the issue stress the importance of a support network. However she has one by one alienated her friends by confronting them and they have had enough. Her family doesn't know how to handle her and she feels that her husband can't be the one to save her. She and I have been unsuccessful in locating a support group and I have run out of ideas.
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Author: Mirel T Goldstein, M.S., M.A., LPC

Dear Therapist,
I am a woman who has been struggling for some time with the overwhelming feelings that things are just not right in my life. I question whether things will ever get better? I have spent time contemplating what the world would be like without me? I wake up in the morning and I don't want to face the world. I know that there are people in my life who love and care about me but I don't. At times I wish they would just let me die!
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Author: Mirel T Goldstein, M.S., M.A., LPC

Although some forms of anxiety are helpful because they motivate us to take healthy action (for example, anxiety about illness might lead us to seek treatment), there are other times when feelings of anxiety can lead to a disorder (for example, if the anxiety doesn't make sense in a given situation, or if it is either so much or so intense that it interferes with a person's sense of wellness or quality of life). The diagnosis "Obsessive Compulsive Disorder" (OCD) specifically refers to a type of anxiety disorder in which anxiety over unwanted thoughts leads to repetitive behaviors meant to decrease such anxiety. In this article, however, I will actually be using the term "OCD" rather loosely to refer to anxiety disorders in general that include components of OCD; either anxiety over unwanted thoughts, or repetitive behaviors that a person uses to manage anxiety, or both together.
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