Dealing with uncertainty:

There are many uncertainties in life. Some of bigger concern than others, and while we'd love to have a crystal ball or take a peek into G-d's master plan, the reality, while quite tempting at times, is that we may never know what will be or why things are happening.

So how does one deal with uncertainty?

That will vary by person depending on their coping mechanisms as well as  positive and negative risk factors..

For now, I will try to list some ways (in no particular order) which may be helpful to others.

Mindfulness: Mindfulness is being present in the moment. Taking the time to focus on what is happening around you in this moment. Being mindful, even if with the aid of an app, can help one relax and focus on the ‘here and now’ and not what the future holds. The more you practice mindfulness the better you will feel, the better you will be able to deal with life's challenges.

Looking for the positives: when things aren't going our way, we are often quick to be annoyed/frustrated. While what we may want/need seems to outweigh the positives, perhaps noticing the good and not focusing as much on the bad will give one a sense of a bigger picture. Will the problem disappear? Most likely not, but this will enable you to take a step back and look at the bigger picture and perhaps enable you to cope a little better.

Self care:  As it sounds, self care is taking care of oneself to ensure that we don’t run ourselves into the ground.  Uncertainty is hard. All the worrying, nervousness of what will be/can be etc we get so worked up and anxious, it's important to remember to take a step back and engage in self care. Whatever that may mean to you. I.e., window shopping, socializing with friends about unrelated topics, watching a movie, getting a manicure etc

Planning a best/worst case scenario: uncertainty is frustrating because we don't know what will be, how things will turn out. By planning both scenarios, it gives you some level of control back so that you have a potential plan of action for when the need arises. This helps reduce the anxiety level and helps one cope a little better.

Hobbies: while hobbies don't take the problem away, they can be an escape for a short while, in which you can take a step back, relax and regroup and continue with your day.

Partializing: this simply means breaking down a problem into smaller parts. It is used to break down a big problem into smaller more manageable parts. It can also be used in the sense of "taking things day by day" as opposed to just seeing a big future of uncertainty. This lets one focus on one day at a time more manage-ably.

Faith: for some, the idea that G-d has a master plan and "everything will turn out for the best" and prayer   is soothing enough to carry them through hard times.

All these suggestions will not take away your problem, however they can potentially help you cope more effectively with uncertainty.

Leora Goldenberg, LMSW