Frum Therapist: Mental Health Resources for the Frum Community

Build Better Relationships

Mama-Do-You-Love-Me-Our-Teens-Quest-for-Belief-and-Reassurance-as-they-Emerge-into-Adulthood

Adolescence is a time of searching and a time when many teens are lacking belief in themselves.  It is also a time when they require belief from their parents and the other important people in their lives.  This gives teens the confidence and the security to continue to explore their interests and desires, ask hard questions of themselves and others, and figure out who they really are and who they want to become. Teens are often experim …

The-3-Cs-to-Building-Better-Relationships-and-Your-Business

As I am growing my business while working with others to help them improve their relationships, I realize that the same concepts apply to both building a business and to building better relationships. I refer to this conceptual approach as the 3 C's: Commitment, Consistency, and Cultivation. Commitment Anything we set a goal for requires commitment and follow-through.  A business requires ones commitment and dedication, and so do our …

Time-Balance--Relationships--Tips-For-You-Based-on-My-Own-Learning

I am my own first client.  I have struggles just like you.  I get stressed, overwhelmed, feel tired, get stuck, and sometimes lose track of what matters to me most.  When I feel this way, I luckily have the tools and some fabulous resources to tap into to pick myself up again.  Like you, I just have to make the choice to do so. This week I had the wonderful opportunity to begin a 6-week intensive relationship enrichment progra …

What-We-All-Really-Need--Raffi-and-Abraham-Maslow-Get-it-Right

In last weeks post, I wrote about the significant role the parent-child relationship plays in preventing at-risk behavior in our children.  This week I want to focus on the simple, most basic, foundational needs of any healthy parent-child relationship. Abraham Maslowâs Heirarchy of Needs We all have needs.  Our needs range from very basic needs like food, clothing, and shelter and extend to higher level needs, such as actua …

The-ParentChild-Relationship-as-a-Defense-Against-Bullying-at-AtRisk-Behavior

Our hearts break and we feel so helpless when we hear stories about how our children are ridiculed, abused, called names, taunted OR engage in risky behavior, such as drug use, risky sexual exploration and/or self mutilation. What can we do about this?!   What can we do to help our kids feel empowered, less vulnerable, and more resilient to either feeling harmed by others or harming themselves? Studies have shown that the best protection for …

quotIf-You-Love-Somebody-Set-Them-Freequot

The title of this song by Sting has been roaming around in my mind since early this morning.  (And now I can't get the background singers singing "free, free, set them free" out of my head either!) What does this statement really mean? It could mean a lot of different things, I realized.  Here are my insights as to how we can understand the meaning of this statement as it relates to dating and marriage, parenting, and even ourselves.&nb …

Just-Listen

When I ask you to listen to me and you start giving advice, you have not done what I asked. When I ask you to listen and you begin to tell me why I shouldn't feel that way, you are trampling on my feelings. When I ask you to listen and you feel you have to do something to solve my problem, you have failed me, strange as that may seem. Listen!  All I asked was that you listen, not talk or do, just hear me! And I can do for myself.  I a …

Young-Adults--Resistance-Understanding-the-Need

Children clearly let us know about their need to establish their identity as early as they enter the toddler years.  This is commonly a difficult time for parents, many of whom refer to this time-period by the well known label:  "the terrible two's."  The authors of 'Hold on to Your Kids' call this appearance of separation from the parents "Counterwill."  In my work, I refer to this 'counterwill' as 'resisting control.'  …