Frum Therapist: Mental Health Resources for the Frum Community

Sex Addiction Therapy

This blog is all about real talk and real recovery. No judgment, no shame—just honest conversations about why addiction happens, what’s fueling it, and most importantly, how you can break free.

are--step-groups-turning-frum-yidden-away-from-yiddishkeit

  I came across a graph many years ago which took each of the 12 steps and showed where both the Rambam and Rabeinu Yona discussed them in the Laws of Teshuva.  The second and third steps specifically describe the relationship we have with Hashem. Believe in a higher power – Come to believe that a Power greater than oneself can restore us to sanity      Turn over will and life – Make a decision …

devil-and-angel-in-addiction-treatment-

Devil versus Angel in Addiction Treatment  A soldier is vulnerable when the enemy weakens the defenses that keep him safe. Hungry, angry, lonely, tired, restless, irritable and discontent weaken the defenses of the addict.  Lust, pride, and resentments fuel the fire, confronting the trigger toward relapse. All of a sudden, the soldier in the war of addiction faces a challenge of the devil versus the angel. Before we explore the logical …

is-sex-as-an-obligation-part-of-sex-addiction

Is Sex as an Obligation Part of Sex Addiction?   There is a distinct difference between healthy sex and sexual abuse and addiction. Many people think of sexual addiction as something obsessive and compulsive which happens online or outside the bedroom with other people.  But there is a common thread within the household that rears the ugly head of addiction and that is sex as an obligation. “I did this for you, you owe me sex.&rdq …

how-to-make-yourself-a-priority-in-a-world-of-indifference-impulsivity-and-distraction

How To Make Yourself and Others a Priority in a world of indifference, impulsivity and distraction February 4, 2020   To keep your relationship brimming with love in the loving cup. Whenever you’re wrong, admit it. Whenever you’re right, shut up. – Ogden Nash   1. If you can agree on what constitutes a clean kitchen, you can agree on anything. Most of my clients argue over the most minute details and the import …

the-trauma-of-internet-infidelity

The Trauma of Internet Infidelity One of the justifications of people who view inappropriate material on the Internet is that they are not hurting anyone.  After all, it’s just images, no one else knows.  However, when you look deeper you begin to realize that cybersex is indeed affecting your relationship with your spouse, children, even yourself.   When they finally get caught by their spouse, or their children walk in …

what-did-you-expect-

Our culture, media, and entertainment bombard us online and offline with objectification and sexualization of women every second of the day. A person cannot look at a national news article online without scrolling down to see the latest movie star posing nude or some teacher having an affair with a student. The themes of many TV shows portray women as objects for men's fantasies and pleasures. Rap songs, which I never listen to, are full of derog …

relapse-is-all-about-repeated-shame

“I’ve had a wonderfully healthy childhood, how did I get this thing called sex addiction?” is one of the most commonly asked questions of sex addiction professionals. The truth is, according to Dr. Patrick Carnes, sex addiction is not about sex. It is about core feelings of loneliness and unworthiness. Many addicts, in fact encounter healthy sexuality for the first time when they are in recovery and experience sex without shame. …

Healthy-Sexuality-and-Intimacy-Intensive

Allan J. Katz, Certified Sex Addiction Therapist will be facilitating an intensive program entitled Healthy Sexuality and Intimacy on Nov. 14-21, 2014.  This customized program is based on the latest information by leaders in the field of sexual addiction and compulsivity. Modeled after our highly successful Living Centered Program, this program gives participants the opportunity to explore personal aspects that fuel sexual issues, such as f …

How-Willing-Are-You-To-Quit

I know people who have killed themselves over sex and internet addiction, been put in jail, and contracted all types of horrible diseases. This is a progressive disease. Once the images are no longer exciting enough, people go on to more dangerous; thrill seeking activities like participating with live people instead of simply looking.   If you don't stop now, you're headed for hell on earth. Marriage will not solve this. So many single …

Were-Creating-Apathetic-Robots

     The Orthodox Jewish world continues to seesaw back and forth about the pros and cons of the Asifa on Technology at Citified in New York, shown in communities around the world. Debates abound about the best filters, blocks and technological band aids which will surely repair the dangerous environmental influences of the outside world. Letâs ban or block the Internet and suddenly our children will be less distract …

Protecting-Our-Children-From-Todays-Epidemic

As societal norms continue to creep into Orthodox Jewish society, the plague of internet addiction to pornography has now begun surfacing in the Torah world as well. Rabbi Yehoshua Shapira, Dean of the prestigious Ramat Gan Yeshiva, estimates that 80 to 97% of Internet users in the modern Orthodox community have fallen victim to the porn epidemic and will occasionally seek out pornographic sites. He maintains that the temptation is so …