Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

November 26th, 2025

Dear Therapist: My son is a great boy, kind, sincere, and easygoing. He recently got engaged, and baruch Hashem the kallah seems like an excellent girl. One thing I’ve noticed over the years is that he can be a little absent-minded. He forgets small things sometimes. But now that he’s engaged, I’ve seen a few moments where he forgot to follow up on something he told his kallah, or didn’t realize how somethin …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

November 26th, 2025

Dear Therapist: My wife and I have been married five years, baruch Hashem, and we have two wonderful children. When we got engaged, her plan was to become a social worker, and she was also doing some photography on the side. That played a big part in how I understood her goals. Soon after the chasuna, she stopped college, and within a year she stopped photography too. She’s been working a part-time remote job since then, but now she&rs …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

November 26th, 2025

Dear Therapist: My wife has close friends, and she isn’t shy. But I notice that she avoids big events. Simchos, Shabbos meals with new people, even shul. She will come up with an excuse not to go. She doesn’t say it’s anxiety, just that it’s “too much,” or that she’s not in the mood. She always has been like this to a degree, but it is getting worse recently. Is it possible to be a sociable person bu …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

November 26th, 2025

Dear Therapist: I’ve been feeling really off physically for a long time, beyond regular tired. My whole body hurts some days, or just feels heavy, like I’m walking through water. I’ve seen doctors, done blood work, they always say nothing’s wrong or just say “maybe it's stress.” This isn’t just stress. I crash after normal things like taking the kids to the park or making Shabbos and it’s not normal …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

November 26th, 2025

Dear Therapist: Thank you for your informative and insightful column. I am reaching out for guidance regarding my 15-year-old daughter, who has been experiencing motor tics for several years. The tics have followed a fluctuating course, typically appearing for a period of time and then resolving for several months. There have been intervals of up to six months without any symptoms, followed by sudden recurrences, often in connection with identifi …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

November 26th, 2025

Dear Therapist: I am 54 years old, the owner of a successful business, and I give a nightly shiur. I grew up in a difficult home and developed OCD and anxiety before my bar mitzvah. In those days, there was no treatment for this. I married a wonderful girl, but our marriage was greatly impacted by my emotional problems. At my wife's insistence I made my rounds to many therapists, but my symptoms never went away. I finally …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

November 26th, 2025

Dear Therapist: I’m someone who likes to talk things through when something’s bothering me—it helps me process and feel closer. But my husband just goes quiet, moves on quickly, or just says “it’s fine.” He’s not cold or mean, he just doesn’t really do the whole talking-about-feelings thing. I’m trying not to push, but I also sometimes feel alone and that things are unresolved. Is this a norma …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

November 26th, 2025

Dear Therapist: I’m writing about my 6-year-old son, who started his second year of school. He’s usually a happy, easygoing kid, and last year went well overall. But since school started, he’s been refusing to go in the mornings and sharing strange fears—like the bus getting lost, getting in trouble, or even the police showing up. When he gets anxious, he becomes really upset and hard to calm down. He also seems to misinte …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

November 26th, 2025

Dear Therapist: I’ve been feeling something lately that I’m not even sure how to put into words. I have a sibling who I’m close with, and I do care about them a lot. But when I hear about all the good things going on in their life — whether it's their job, their social life, or how smoothly everything seems to go, I sometimes walk away from our conversations feeling frustrated or not good enough. I don’t want to feel …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

November 26th, 2025

Dear Therapist: I got married recently, baruch Hashem, and overall things are good. My wife and I get along well, I’m happy to be building a life with her, and I’m grateful for what I have. But at the same time, I’ve been feeling stuck lately. Before marriage, I felt like I was really growing—in learning, in personal development, in self-awareness. I had space to think, dream, and work on myself. Particularly, wh …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

November 26th, 2025

Dear Therapist: I am a girl that has been teaching for a few years now. Before I go into the classroom, I often feel symptoms of anxiety. It usually starts before I even leave for work and continues until I’m actually in the classroom. Once I’m there, the anxiety lessens, but it doesn’t go away completely. Now that it’s summer break, I’m barely feeling any anxiety at all. But when I think about going back to work, I …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

November 26th, 2025

Dear Therapist: My son is in his early teens and has been struggling emotionally for a while now. We’re considering therapy to help with his anxiety and frustration, but there’s an added complication—he also has a language delay and has trouble expressing himself clearly, especially when it comes to his emotions. He’s intelligent and very sensitive, but when something’s bothering him, he often can’t find the wo …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

July 29th, 2025

Dear Therapist: I’ve always felt more myself around my friends than with family. With friends, I feel understood and comfortable. With family, it’s more tense—I feel judged or like I have to be careful. Recently, I chose to go to a close friend’s simcha instead of a family event, and my family was really upset. They said I was choosing friends over family, and maybe I was. But the truth is, I often feel more emotionally co …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

July 29th, 2025

Dear Therapist: I’ve always been the type to think a lot—about people, situations, conversations, and about “life” in general. Sometimes I pick up on things others don’t, and I think that’s a strength. But it also makes me anxious and depressed. I also tend to be a little cynical. I replay things in my head, overanalyze, and sometimes get sad and discouraged when I look at what is going on around me.   Som …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

July 29th, 2025

Dear Therapist: As the parent of a smart, kind, and good-hearted son who is about to enter shidduchim, I’ve started to feel concerned about something I’ve noticed for a while. When he’s under stress or feeling anxious, especially when things are emotionally charged—he either stutters a lot or has a hard time communicating clearly. He often shuts down, and it takes time and effort to coax out what’s really going on. I …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

July 29th, 2025

Dear Therapist: We recently had our first baby, and while baruch Hashem everything went smoothly, it’s definitely been an adjustment. Right now, we’re staying at my parents’ house for a little extra support, which has helped a lot. Lately, my husband mentioned that he’s thinking about sleeping at our apartment some nights so he can get better rest. He says it would help him function better during the day and be more presen …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

July 29th, 2025

Dear Therapist: My son is in 11th grade, and he’s always been a picky eater—but it hasn’t improved with age. He does eat regularly and while he is skinny is basically a normal weight, so it’s not about body image or restricting food. But his diet is extremely limited: a few specific foods, no variety, and no interest in trying anything new. It makes supper, and Shabbos meals hard. He won’t eat at other people’s …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

July 29th, 2025

Dear Therapist: I was supposed to go to Eretz Yisroel this summer—something I earned as a reward and that I have been looking forward to for a long time. But with the current situation, the trip was cancelled, and even though I completely understand why, I’m  having a very hard time dealing with it. I feel disappointed, frustrated, and even a little embarrassed, like I was all ready for something that just got taken away. It isn& …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

June 23rd, 2025

Dear Therapist: Our son had a rough few years—emotionally, socially, and in his yiddishkeit. Over the past 2 years in yeshiva in Eretz Yisroel there was a real turnaround. He connected with his rebbeim, grew in his learning, and seemed more stable and happier overall. We were so grateful to see him in a better place. He came home for Pesach and has been back since, and little by little, we’re seeing some of the old patterns …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

June 23rd, 2025

Dear Therapist: Lately I’ve been noticing how much pressure I put on myself to do things right. Even small things, like cooking for Shabbos or writing a thank-you note, start to feel stressful—like there’s one correct way to do it, and if I don’t get it perfect, it reflects badly on me. I end up procrastinating or overthinking things that really shouldn’t be so complicated. People probably see me as respons …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

June 23rd, 2025

Dear Therapist: Thank you for your thoughtful and insightful column. I’m curious about how to understand the difference between a close, meaningful friendship and one that may be overly dependent or emotionally intense. In close relationships, it’s natural to want to spend time together and share thoughts and experiences—but is there a point where that closeness becomes unhealthy? What are some signs that an attachment to a frie …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

June 23rd, 2025

Dear Therapist: What is your opinion on taking medication for anxiety? I’ve tried quite a few therapists over the years, but it didn’t really help. Recently, my mother brought up the idea of taking medication, but I feel weird about it. I’ve been going to therapy privately, and I’m pretty sure other people my age do too. But taking pills feels like a different level—like something more serious. What’s your take …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

June 23rd, 2025

Dear Therapist: B”H Hashem has blessed us with many wonderful grandchildren. The other blessing is that they enjoy spending time with us.
My husband is a caring, generous, loving, and devoted grandfather.
He often criticizes the teenage boys. Although they take it in good stride it bothers me very much. I feel he should be complimenting them much more. Every teenage boy needs chizuk and that should be our main goal. My …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

June 23rd, 2025

Dear Therapist: My husband recently started going to therapy, and I can see that it’s been good for him. He seems calmer and more focused, and I know he’s working on himself. I really do want to be supportive and I’m glad it’s helping him—but at the same time, it leaves me a bit lost. He’s thinking differently, approaching things in new ways, and meanwhile I feel like I’m still in the same place. It&rsquo …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

June 23rd, 2025

Dear Therapist: Being in seminary this year has made me realize how hard it is for me to really trust people. Even when someone hasn’t done anything wrong, I find myself holding back or expecting to get hurt. It’s like I’m always bracing for something to go wrong. I know that not everyone is out to hurt me and I honestly want to feel close to people. It’s just really hard for me to let my guard down. Keeping a bi …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

June 23rd, 2025

Dear Therapist: Over Yom Tov, I was by a few different families, and I found myself constantly comparing myself to them.  One family had such a calm atmosphere, another had a beautiful home, and everyone just seemed so confident, happy, and “put together.” I couldn’t help but compare it to my own life—and walk away feeling like I’m behind, or like I’m not enough. I am not sure if it's just me but I definit …
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Author: Dr. Avraham (Allan) Friedman, Psy. D., LMSW

June 6th, 2025

How Do We Live With Impurity – Parshat Naso Impurity is a concept basically insignificant to 21st century Man. It has few halachic ramifications (aside from Niddah and Kohen) yet it occupies a significant amount of discussion in the Torah. Without delving into the philosophical concept of impurity, I would like to share some thoughts on how we react to impurity. The Torah describes differing levels of ritual impurity, Tum’ah, which ha …
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Author: Dr. Avraham (Allan) Friedman, Psy. D., LMSW

June 3rd, 2025

Attention to Detail Only? – Bamidbar/Shavuot Shavuot is one of the easiest holidays to write about. We celebrate the revelation at Har Sinai and the receiving of the Torah. So, theoretically, any concept used from the Torah is fair play. Yet the topic for this blog corresponds so wonderfully to Bamidbar, the parsha we  read this past Shabbat. The Torah discusses how to pack up the Mishkan every time it is moved.1 It invests time discus …
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Author: Dr. Avraham (Allan) Friedman, Psy. D., LMSW

May 23rd, 2025

Overcoming  Ulterior Motives - Parshat Behar-Bechukotai Since the days of Freud, we have spoken more openly of ulterior motives. Whether or not you agree with his theories and methods, we are thankful to his creating a culture where people are more aware of their psychological makeup. Freud, of course, did not invent the concept. The concept, in fact, is thousands of years old. In this week’s parsha, the Torah describes the phenomena …
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Author: Dr. Avraham (Allan) Friedman, Psy. D., LMSW

May 9th, 2025

Be Holy! Huh?? How??? There are times when the Torah tells us things which seem beyond us. Yet, we are expected to follow the Torah’s precepts. So when the Torah tells us to be holy,1 we might be inclined to answer with a Bill Cosby-type answer, “Yeah, right. What’s holy?”2 How does one become holy? Is there a path to holiness? Rabbi Oshi Bloom quotes the great Chassidic sage, Maor Vashemesh, who somehow succeeds in expla …
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Author: Allan J. Katz LPC/CSAT

May 7th, 2025

Devil versus Angel in Addiction Treatment  A soldier is vulnerable when the enemy weakens the defenses that keep him safe. Hungry, angry, lonely, tired, restless, irritable and discontent weaken the defenses of the addict.  Lust, pride, and resentments fuel the fire, confronting the trigger toward relapse. All of a sudden, the soldier in the war of addiction faces a challenge of the devil versus the angel. Before we explore the logical …
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Author: Dr. Avraham (Allan) Friedman, Psy. D., LMSW

May 2nd, 2025

Do I Have To? – Parshat Tazria-Metzora It never ceases to amaze me that there are so many new concepts I have encountered since starting this blog. Since I started in 2015 (including a hiatus from corona til this past toledot), I have been introduced to ideas which have opened my own heart and mind and have shared those. The Torah always has something new to add. So, as I started preparing for this week’s article, I was confronte …
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Author: Dr. Avraham (Allan) Friedman, Psy. D., LMSW

April 25th, 2025

Oh, the Humanity! – Parshat Shemini This phrase has been etched into my memory ever since the first time I heard the recording of the Hindenburg explosion as a kid. My father bought a set of records with historical recordings and this was among them. There was a large crowd waiting in anticipation in 1937 for the airship’s arrival. Yet, upon approaching its New jersey landing point, it burst into flames. Upon witnessing the disaster …
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Author: Dr. Avraham (Allan) Friedman, Psy. D., LMSW

April 11th, 2025

Holy Ashes Cleaning out the grill at the end of any usage, or even kashering the grill for pesach, is not a chore which I thoroughly enjoy (yes there are chores I thoroughly enjoy). I understand the importance of it. I know that cleaning will prepare the grill for the next fun usage. I remember the first time I noticed the mitzva of how we treat the ashes on the Mizbeach.1  It was about 45 years ago when I was studying in yeshiva in Israel a …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

April 4th, 2025

Dear Therapist: I’ve always struggled with my temper. Lately I’ve been realizing that it’s not always about how bad a situation is, but more about things not going the way I expected or planned. I’m starting to wonder if my anger has more to do with being rigid—like I just have a really hard time when things don’t go the way I think they should. Is that a common root of anger issues? Is that what I should …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

April 4th, 2025

Dear Therapist: I recently started therapy, and I can honestly say it’s been something I really need—it’s helping. But even though people say the stigma around therapy is fading, I still feel like many of my friends don’t really understand it. I could never imagine telling them I’m in therapy. Not long ago, one of my friends made a joke about people who go to therapy, and it really stung. I didn’t feel like I c …
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Author: Dr. Avraham (Allan) Friedman, Psy. D., LMSW

April 4th, 2025

Responsible Leader  Can you imagine someone running for public office, and their flyer would state that the candidate is a humble statesman? Or that he is modest? That candidate would become a laughingstock in the world of politics. And now, close your eyes and imagine the following. Imagine a leader saying: “oops.” Or “I made a mistake.”  Unthinkable! Yet, that is exactly what this parsha celebrates. We read of …
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Author: Dr. Avraham (Allan) Friedman, Psy. D., LMSW

March 28th, 2025

A Perfectly Imperfect World I can’t count how many times I’ve wanted things to go right. And how many times I felt the frustration, anger and disappointment when things didn’t go exactly to plan. It has ranged from embarrassing moments to medical surprises to getting cut off by another driver. Why can’t the world just be perfect?!?!? In this week’s parsha, we read of the actual building of the Mishkan. When …
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Author: Dr. Avraham (Allan) Friedman, Psy. D., LMSW

March 21st, 2025

Develop Your Gifts – Parshat Vayakhel I know I am not Rabbi Soloveichik. I am also not Michael Jordan. Nor am I Sir Elton John nor Dr. Viktor Frankl. I am me. I can look with jealousy at what they have achieved. Will that jealousy inspire me or send me into fits of frustration or depression? As I write these lines I also realize that Michael Jordan is not Elton John. Yes, I know that is kind of obvious but the realization was that each was …
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Author: Yehuda Lieberman, LCSW, QCSW, DCSW

March 20th, 2025

Dear Therapist: Is feeling that I don't have anything to say in social situations social anxiety? Even in situations where I don't feel anxious, I have a hard time making conversation. Even when I am with people that I feel comfortable with. Am I just missing some sort of social skill or is this part of social anxiety? Or maybe this is just who I am and I should accept it. I would appreciate your advice. Thank you.    Response: At first …
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